From Birthday to Birthday
by Imagi
Summary: Birthday story for Kobold Necromancer! This will revolve around the Birthdays of 4 different people both belated and not...good and bad. As for what will happen....guess you will just have to read and see. :D Enjoy Necro! :D 4th B-Day is now up!
1. Bittersweet Strawberries

_**From Birthday to Birthday**_

_This alternative episode of TDI contains extreme stunts preformed by our favorite animated teens. Do not try any of what you see here in real life. Seriously…this is a Birthday gift not a lawsuit._

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Chapter One: Bittersweet Strawberries

"Strawberry?"

Without waiting for an answer, Izzy proceeded to shove the fruit into the downcast Homeschooler's mouth. Ezekiel's eyes widened in shock and his hands flew up to his mouth. Izzy tsked shaking her head from side to side as the brunet coughed violently.

A sudden slap to his back forced the remains of the fruit out of his esophagus. Taking several deep breaths, Ezekiel turned teary eyes on his savior. Offering a brief smile at Harold, the homeschooler turned his attention back to their table.

Izzy scowled. "Zekey is still upset." Harold nodded back with a frown. "He should. I am too, but my team lost. Ezekiel WON the challenge for his team." The red head gasped before wild green eyes narrowed.

"E-venger hasn't heard that one…tell E-venger everything." Harold nodded ignoring Izzy's latest alter ego before explaining what had occurred less then an hour prior.

* * *

"_You useless cretins!! How could you LOSE to a SEXIST SLUG!" Courtney roared out angrily as she yanked the bow out of the brick house's hand and threw it harshly to the ground. Nearby the members of The Screaming Trekkers were jumping up and down excitedly around a grinning Ezekiel._

_The prairie boy much to the CIT's joy had been chosen against DJ for the Bow and Arrow paint obstacle course challenge. While his team had greatly bemoaned their luck, The Killer Finders had rejoiced._

_The joy had only continued when Chris had proceeded to taunt the homeschooler by mentioning just how bad a shot the brunet was. Unfortunately for them the continuous jabs made about his mother had somehow set off the quiet brunet._

_Though DJ was by far faster then the other male, Ezekiel had easily caught up when it came to the targets. With one quick shot the paint buckets, over his teammates toppled. This accuracy had proved to be the Finders downfall._

_A happy Chris watched the whole thing in eager delight. The insults, the hate and the more insults….he loved it all. And being the considering host he was he decided to make the "happy" scene even more delightful._

"_So Congrads to the Trekkers for trekking their way to victory! As for The Killer Finders…no Bridge Ceremony tonight!" As Chris's words sank in the cheers of the Trekkers ended and the protests began._

_Grinning happily the sadist proceeded to pull out a Birthday hat and put it on his head before proceeding to blow into a party streamer. Ignoring the explorers' confusion, the host grinned wickedly at the group._

"_Oh did I forget to mention that today is everyone's FAVVVVVORITE little CIT's 18__th__ Birthday?" Courtney's annoyance instantly faded and she smiled proudly while Geoff let out a whoop of delight._

_Before the party animal could speak, Chris continued. "And thanks to her parents lawsuit we're throwing their darling little…..an...gel a Birthday party complete with Cake and Ice Cream!!" Chris's declaration of course incited more cheers. _

_The narcissist's grin grew as he added the kicker. And Courtney as the Birthday Girl you get to decide just WHO should be voted off! On the Finders AND on the Trekkers!" Ignoring the large amount of upset protests, the host focused in on the CIT._

_Courtney smirked. "Harold of course and Ezekiel. Both of you are rather useless and it is MY Birthday after all." Not surprisingly Harold was the first to protest. Ezekiel on the other hand his face was pale._

"_Boot it's noot-"_

"_Harold, Zeke you heard the CIT! After the cake and ice cream and the traditional B-Day song your butts are out of here!"_

* * *

"It's…noot FAIR!!!"

Ezekiel roared out slamming his fists on the table and startling his companions. Harold sighed. "Of course it wasn't. It was like Wolverine discovering his best friend was taken over as a pawn for Sinister."

Izzy and Ezekiel looked over at Harold in confusion and he grinned back sheepishly. Izzy shrugged before reaching for the bowl of strawberries. Shoving strawberry after strawberry into her mouth she waited for Ezekiel's reaction.

"I doon't knoo who Wolverine oor who that other guy is eh, boot that's noot….I'm noot mad because of that eh." Taking a shuddering breath he continued. "It's…it's my Birthday today too eh…and having to eat strawberry cake instead of chocolate…."

Ezekiel let out another sigh and stared back down at the table. Izzy spit out the remains of half eaten strawberries coating Harold's face and glasses with the gooey red liquid. While the auburn haired nerd coughed and started to clean his glasses, Izzy pounced.

"My Zeke's Birthday?! And he got kicked off TDW for it? And on his Birthday! No No No!! E-venger will not let this go unpunished! Just give me some red ants! And Gertie and Bertie…ooh! And lots and lots of green jello! But first E-venger needs a telephone!"

"A telephone?" Harold asked incredulity while Izzy rapidly nodded her head. "Yep!! It's Zeke's birthday and she's going to do it! And no one will stop her either!"

* * *

The phone in Izzy's hand rang monotonously. Izzy though didn't seem to care and she even proceeded to imitate the beeps. Just when both males had reached their breaking points the phone clicked.

Izzy grinned. "See?! E-venger knew we would get through!" Izzy declared earning a chuckle from the other end of the phone. "Well I'm glad you did Miss…This is Necro Michael and you are caller Number 48!"

Izzy let out a happy screech, Harold grinned and Ezekiel just looked plain confused. "Alright! So what did Izzy win? New shoes? A piranha cage? Or maybe even one of those talking robot dogs from Japan?"

The person on the other end chuckled loudly. "Well I don't know about those prizes Miss Izzy, but we do have a signed poster of Chris McClain, concert tickets to the Army Core Ballet as well as a family 5 pack Cruise up for grabs. All you have to do is guess the right door and-"

"Door 1!!!" Izzy bellowed out before jumping up and down. "That's right isn't it? Yay!!! Awesome! We get to go on a cruise to somewhere that's not here! Oooh I hope there's Bears! And Snakes!"

Necro Michael let out another chuckle at her enthusiasm before proceeding to explain. "Actually Miss Izzy while you did correctly pick the Cruise door you need to now answer all the questions correctly to win."

Harold's grin now matched Izzy's. "Lay them on us Necro Michael! Our buddy had a super lousy 18th Birthday and this is just the thing to make it up to him! As a veteran of Stealthy Sam's Possum Scouts we will not let him down!"

* * *

The doors to the restaurant opened admitting Gwen and Noah. The latter of course had his nose stuffed in a book. Constant shouts about pickled coconuts and other bizarre foods had both Goth and Noah raising an eyebrow.

Not far away was Izzy with the latest vote offs from Total Drama Wilderness. Izzy and Harold were shouting things into a phone Ezekiel held. A few seconds later Izzy let out a victorious howl before leaping across the table and colliding with the prairie boy.

Goth, Nerd and Know-it-all collectively winced at the thud. "Do we even want to know?" Noah drawled fixing the taller teen with a bored glare. In response Harold grinned back.

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: So that's the first part…there will be much more...Necro hope you liked and Happy Birthday to you!!!! :D

To other people…I'm giving my poll one more week before I replace it with another one. :D

Again Happy B-Day Necro!!!

Imagi


	2. Waiting makes the Trip Shorter

_**Chapter Two: Waiting makes the Trip Shorter**_

* * *

"_But…you…I thought we…" Bridgette trailed off her lazy green eyes wide with a mixture of shock and sorrow. The rest of The Killer Finders and The Screaming Trekkers were similarly taken back. Chris McClain rubbed his hands together with a delighted grin on his face._

"_Nothing personal Bridge, but it's just a game. And as any good host knows both future and current, the ratings are what makes or breaks a show. And another double elimination by Moi?! Chris, my Man you've out done yourself!"_

"_Oh think nothing of it my little protégé. Eliminating BOTH your Girlfriend AND hottie Lindsay on your Birthday? Oh man!!! Forget about the roof! The ratings went right through the stratosphere with that one!"_

_Chris laughed heartedly before wiping a tear from his eye and offering the party animal a proud smile. "Nice work there…nice work." Just as quickly the host's smile turned sadistic again as he turned his attention on the blonde duo._

"_Lindsay…Bridgette. To The Bridge of Shame! After cake and ice cream of course! Hope you guys like Strawberry!" With that the TDW host left for the Tent Café. Geoff waved cheerfully at the host before turning his attention back to Bridgette._

_The pony tailed blonde would have fallen over had it not been for LeShawna. The sister gently placed her back upright and rubbed her shoulders in a comforting manner. The sassy sister glared daggers at the party boy while the surfer girl fought back tears._

"_Awww cheer up Babe! This doesn't really change anything…I mean you are still an uber babe even though you aren't that hot, but those make out sessions?! Ho Ho!! They more then make up for it!"_

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_

Bridgette had seen the signs during the Aftermath Show. Despite her best attempts, slowly but surely her boyfriend was being corrupted by the glamour life. It had taken a full scale couple spat in front of a studio audience and countless viewers to stop the poison.

_Geoff had even promised to never let something as dumb as a TV show come between them every again. And she had stupidly believed him. Even when he showed up to the newest Total Drama wearing a pink ascot, a figure hugging white top and matching black jeans, she had believed._

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That finally callous comment was the last straw. With a feral cry, she lunged forward tackling the surprised Birthday Boy. Through the curtain of tears she let her fists fly. The rage flowing through her body controlled her actions.

_All too soon she was pulled away from the blonde male by strong yet gentle hands. "WE'RE THROUGH!!!!" Bridgette yelled out blindly to the air before burying her head in the person's arms._

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* * *

_

Through the hum of boat leaving, to the feel of her feet hitting the dock, she clutched the unknown person tightly. Her jumbled emotions unaware of anything but the tapping from Lindsay's cowboy boots and the rolling sound from her luggage.

_Vaguely she heard a ding as well as the sound of doors sliding open. She also heard the sounds of people chatting excitedly in the lobby though they quickly died off. "Bridgette! Are you okay?" _

_Recognizing the voice belonging to Harold she gradually removed herself from the strong arms and flung herself in the direction of the nerd. Landing in awkward arms she proceeded to vent out all her anger and sorrow._

_Had she been more aware she would have noticed the arms holding her tight were very comfortable. Almost like the person holding her was wearing a thick jacket or a sweater. Also the person's hands trembled slightly._

_Bridgette lost track of time as she rapidly spoke, as she unleashed a tidal wave of emotional anguish. The person holding her didn't speak, but the gentle pressure around her body conveyed his actions for him._

_All too soon the feeling changed. With a cry of surprise, the surfer girl was lifted up off the ground and cradled in someone's arms. On reflex she flung her arms around the person's head and she smiled weakly. "A little warning would have been nice." _

"_Soory eh." Bridgette's body instantly tensed and her eyes shot open. There was only one person from the show who had that thick of an accent. "Feeling better eh?" Ezekiel asked as he continued to walk through the lobby._

_The calm yet gentle voice of the sexist made her eyes widen even more. Hesitantly she nodded. "Where are you taking me? The surfer girl whimpered. In response, the prairie boy turned down a short corridor that led to the hotel entrance. _

_Outside the clear doors slid open as Tyler raced by cheering loudly while holding a happy Lindsay in his arms. Noah followed slowly after them with a stunned look of disbelief on his face._

* * *

Bridgette let out a yawn and opened tired green eyes. At the sight of her surroundings her eyes flew open with shock for a few seconds before she relaxed remembering the events several hours ago.

Next to her Noah offered her a real smile. "I know. From heartbreak, to hotel to soon being ship bound…and all without the loving kindness of our host being provided. It's either a dream or an Izzy intoxicated nightmare."

The surfer girl shook her head in amazement. "I still can't believe they won a radio contest let alone one of the BIG ones. And that they would take everyone with them. I mean the contest was for 5 right?"

"Four people and one guardian. Or show guardian which is why Chef is here." Gwen spoke up across the aisle. "As for how…once Lindsay found out about the cruise she called her Dad and he did the rest."

The goth gestured to the blonde and her boyfriend watching the overhead movie a few rows ahead of them. Tyler was grinning as he held the gasping blonde tight while across the way Chef and Harold sat cheering at the action on the screen.

"So thousands of miles away from Heather and Chris and we're going on a cruise to the Bahamas." Gwen let out a happy sigh as she sank back into her seat. Bridgette smiled back, but her smile turned to confusion when she noticed something.

"Wait a minute…where are Ezekiel and Izzy?"

* * *

YEAH!!! RIGHT IN THE COOKING POT!!!" Izzy cheered happily from Ezekiel's lap. The prairie boy smiled at the red head's enthusiasm before cringing as another monster lunged at the hero on the screen in front of him.

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* * *

_

After it had been apparent that Izzy was not going to take being up in a plane lightly, Ezekiel had come up with a silent solution. After a talk in Spanish to the lady at the airport check in, he had managed to secure a single seat in First Class as well as a belt extension.

_Izzy's venomous protests were ended when the prairie boy sat back into the plush seat and gestured to the screen. "We can watch scary moovies here eh." That did it. With a fierce leap, the crazy girl landed on Ezekiel's lap and the seat belt was secured around them._

_The flight attendants at first were not happy with that arrangement. Izzy raised an eyebrow before grinning wickedly. "Mile High Club, Hijack or My Zeke keeping planeophobic Izzy calm. Your choice!"_

* * *

Izzy's happy glee ended when horror scene in front of her faded to black. Seconds later the wild red head started to panic. Expecting the reaction Ezekiel clung onto the struggling female as she fought to run away.

Vaguely he was aware of the announcement on the radio that the plane was landing shortly, as he tried desperately to keep Izzy calm.

* * *

"GANGWAY!!! EZZY AND THE OTHER CONTEST WINNERS...AND GUESTS…HECK!! COMING THROUGH!!!" Izzy bellowed out happily as she raced into the large grey building dragging a wide eyed prairie boy behind her.

Chef Hatchet grinned at the chaos caused by the pair as Izzy with the terrified brunet in tow jumped right through the DO NOT ENTER section and right up to the counter ignoring the many complaints from the people in line.

The large male chuckled lowly as he and the rest of the group made there way to the counter as well. The protests in line grew louder, but one glare from the burly male silenced the lot. Smirking, Chef turned his attention back to the counter.

"Before you stand 8 teenagers and myself. We are from the hit show Total Drama Wilderness. And if you watch the show you will recognize a few of the more UNSTABLE cast members are present."

Chef grinned toothily gesturing to his charges that are no longer by his side. Izzy is now trying to climb up a large ship replica in the corner with Ezekiel, Harold and Bridgette attempting to stop her, Tyler and Lindsay are making out, Gwen is rolling her eyes and Noah is reading a book.

The cook grinned again at the dumbfounded woman. "And this is only 8 of 22." Chef Hatchet said before turning his head to face his charges. "YOU MAGGOTS GET YOUR BUTTS OVER HERE AND CHECK IN BEFORE I LOSE MY PATIENCE!!!"

The yell from Chef Hatchet's voice echoed throughout the whole building silencing again the complaints of those in line and quickly bringing back the wayward teens. Noah rolled his eyes as he passed the employee a stack of paper.

"Lucky for you most of us already did the online paperwork. You can thank us by getting us on board and getting a straight jacket for Izzy." The tanned male drawled rolling his eyes again at his companions. Izzy stuck her tongue out in response.

Much to the lady's relief the paperwork for the unruly group was fairly simple. The moment she handed over the necessary materials the red headed girl had let out a wild battle cry before dashing for the open doors.

Open mouthed, both employees and fellow cruisers watched as Izzy swung her way up to the top of the escalator using the end of the Welcome Banner. Ezekiel promptly let out a yelp and raced after the red head.

Gwen on the other hand shrugged. "Just accept it as being an Izzy thing. You'll sleep better at night." The Goth advised the other passengers before following the rest of her group at a leisurely pace.

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: Well that's two! And in a fast rate too. :D Hope you like Necro! :D

Also thanks for the reviews everyone! :)

Oh yeah…and I've got a NEW poll up…so yeah take it guys…and no I'm not elaborating. ;)

Imagi


	3. All is Fair in Love and Phones

_**Chapter Three: All is fair in Love and Phones**_

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Attention all Cruise Guests. Muster Drill is now in progress. If you haven't already done so, please retrieve your lifejackets and without wearing them proceed to Deck 4. Stay clear of the doors and please remain silent during the drill so everyone may benefit…

"There! Right by the theater doors! Now bring those bags in closer we don't want to loose them and Ethan I know Iris is on your shoulders but can you like try to stay on your feet? Hey excuse me sir but can you take our picture please? Okay! I think we're all set! Say Gouda everyone!!!"

Lindsay chirped out happily smiling as the older male snapped off a few pictures of the lifejacket wearing group before handing the blonde back her new camera. "Yay! Our first cruise group photo!!! Now we can actually start our cruise!"

"Good thing the gift shop was open huh Lindsay." Noah commented with a dry smirk. The jumping bubbly blonde enthusiastically nodded. "I know right? And they just had the cutest little bikini!"

"We know." Gwen interjected with a smile pointing to the new teal bikini with light pink flowers that Lindsay wore though only the bottom of the suit could be seen thanks to the bulky lifejacket. "And you had to get in every color." Noah finished.

"Well every color except blue. I saved that for Brenna." Lindsay declared before pulling said suit out of one of her many shopping bags and shoving it in the arms of the other blonde. "Umm…thank you Lindsay."

"Well hurry up and try it on! I want to see how cute you look!" Bridgette looked from the rapidly filling theater before turning a smile back on the taller girl. "I think the Muster Drill is about to start."

"So? Now hurry up and change before the Ketchup Drill comes!" The surfer girl stared in disbelief for a moment or two. Lindsay ended it by grabbing her hand and leading her rapidly out of the room.

* * *

Chris McClain wasn't happy. And when he wasn't happy the explorers rejoiced. Only now they had more of a reason to celebrate. Chef Hatchet the Gourmet of Gross had been absent since last night's vote off and his whereabouts were unknown.

"Well wherever Chef is he's happy and Chris isn't. Not that I'm complaining." Cody commented absently through a mouthful of hotdogs. A loud protest from the sadistic host caused the tecnogeek to grin broadly showing bits of chewed up meat.

The rest of the teens were also amused especially when Chris started to whine into the phone he held in his hand. "But Cheeef? How come you got to go? Not that you don't DESERVE to have gone…Gosh Darn it! This is about all the nerdy, homeschooled and insane comments isn't it?"

At the mention of the word nerd LeShawna's eyes widened. "Is that my sugar baby on the phone?" The sister asked walking up purposely towards the host. What happened next resorted in a brief tug of war over the device ending up with LeShawna as the victor.

Smiling the sister hit the speaker button and Chef's voice was broadcast throughout the tent. "Not that it's not great talkin to you Chef, but can Luscious LeShawna speak to her sugar baby? After a brief pause Harold's happy voice was heard.

"_My Chocolate Goddess! How I have missed you my love!"_

LeShawna smiled back at the sound of her pet name. "How you been baby? You guys been kickin it real at Playa des Losers?" Nearby Courtney let out a snicker. "Key word being loser." The CIT snickered before receiving a venomous glare from the sister.

"_Cheated on the Million bucks yes. But would a LOSER have managed to guess one of 10 super secret questions to win a week's cruise in the Bahamas which by the way has been ongoing for well over two weeks?"_

"Wait Harold baby back up. You are where now?!"

"_Tampa Florida in the United States. See Izzy, Ezekiel and I won the radio contest and in an act of gallantry Noah graciously gave up his claim on the last of our prize winning tickets to Gwen with the other going to Chef as our show guardian of course."_

Around the tent the Killer Finders and Screaming Trekkers are staring wide eyed at the phone that the sassy sister held. Chris scowled and yanked it away. "Just cause you guys picked Chef instead of Moi does not mean that I'm jealous!"

The host barked into the phone. In response came a very cynical sounding laugh. LeShawna's eyes widened and she yanked back the phone. "Turkey boy? You're there too? But Harold said-"

"_Yes. I as well as Tyler, Lindsay and Bridgette are here as well wearing the fashionable red and yellow lifejackets. Though the latter are currently pit stopped if you get my drift. As for the why? Lindsay wanted to go on the trip and her dad made it happen."_

Noah finished dryly though LeShawna could have sworn that somehow the show know-it-all somehow seemed a teeny bit happier then normal. Her musings were cut to an end when Chris grabbed back the phone.

Just as quickly it was taken away again this time by a very hyper pair of girls. "Oh my gosh! Noah you guys so have to get Sadie and me a snow globe from the Bahamas!" Next to Katie Sadie clapped her hands in excitement.

"Oh my gosh yes! Katie and I have been collecting snow globes since like forever and we totally don't have one from the Bahamas yet! Or from a Cruise Ship. Do you think you could like get us a cruise snow globe too? Pleeeeeeease!! Pretty pretty please!!!"

"_Oh sure. I'd love to spend my vacation searching shops for little junky tourist overprized knick knacks. And oh let me guess…you want matching snow globes."_

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!" The BFFFL's shrieked happily jumping up and down with the phone. With a dark frown Chris reclaimed the phone only for it to disappear again. The host scowled. "Would you knock it off with the phone stealing already?!"

Trent ignored him and spoke into the phone eagerly. "GWEN!! GWEN!!! Are you there Gwen?!" A few seconds later the Goth spoke.

"_For the last time Trent, we are just friends and we will continue to be just friends. That said I got you a few things from the Lucky 9 store on board."_

The disappointment on the musician's face abruptly turned to glee at the mention of his favorite number. "You mean there is a store called Lucky 9?! Oh I so have to get the shirt! And the pin and the postcards cup holder, giant inflatable number 9 and-"

"_I get it Trent. And no I'm not telling you what I got. Now continue to do your best at the challenges WITHOUT fixing them and tell LeShawna to kick Courtney on the butt for voting Homeschool off on his Birthday."_

All around the room people choked on their food and drink at that last interesting tidbit. The CIT in particularly was less then pleased. "You mean that socially inept sexist actually shares the same birthday as ME?! That is UNEXCEPTABLE!!!"

"_No what is unacceptable is the meanie CIT voting off the other half of Ezzy! No one votes off my Zeke and gets away with it! Oh and hey Courtney BEWAAAARE!! Of Baby Teeth!"_

At Izzy's cheerful threat warning the overachiever let out a scoff. "Please. As if that's a real th…what is that sound?"

Chris and the rest of the explorers looked up to see a hole being carved into the canvas of the tent. Courtney frowned. "What on earth?"

* * *

"3…2…and 1!!!" Izzy cheered as a sick sounding glop sounded over the phone followed by a loud plop and then a crash. Grinning eagerly she waited for the explosion. IZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZYYYYY!!!!!!!!"

"Gertie Green Gooagram!!!! And next time CIT leave E-venger's Zekey friend be!" Izzy announced cheerfully before ending the call. With a wicked grin she tossed the phone at the bemused Chef Hatchet.

Not surprisingly the antics of the Total Drama crew both present and remote had resulted in a makeover lifeguard drill. The end of the mandatory session brought the return of Bridgette and Lindsay.

"Sorry we're late for the Ketchup Drill guys! I guess we have to take the Pickle or Relish Drill test then huh? But it took awhile to find the right size and then this really mean girl wanted the same one and there was no way I was letting THAT happen! I mean showees before strangers right?"

Ignoring the sobbing crew member in the background, Bridgette removed her lifejacket showing off her new bikini. Like Lindsay's it had flowers decorating various parts of the light blue bikini only hers were a pale yellow color.

Lindsay clasped her hands together eagerly. "So I told Brenna that nothing cures heartbreak better then fake tanner, tacos and a good bikini! And there are sooo many cute guys on the ship! Well not as cute as my Tiger Ty, but close!"

"So what do you think?" Bridgette asked playfully turning her attention on the quartet of guys. Noah buried himself in his ever present book, Tyler and Harold gave her thumbs up and Ezekiel froze before fainting.

Izzy examined her best friend for a moment before letting out a delighted cackle. Oh yeah knockout by bikini! I knew my Zeke was still hot for the surfer girl!"

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: Okay next part done! Poll is still going on please take it! And Necro hope you liked! :D

Thanks for the reviews everyone! Keep them coming please! I need distractions from the TDM show Zeke hate. Make up your mind put him on and be done with it! I'm tired of the flip flopping!

Oh and blog site for TDI on my profile...go there and rant about what there doing to ZEKE!

Oh yeah and Muster drill is the mandatory drill you take on cruise ships. Sit in a room, get checked off, listen to the instructions and your done. ;)

Gertie Gooagram well I call one of the shark's Gertie. I think you can guess what happened to the CIT. :D

Thanks again!

Imagi


	4. Sightseeing is a Contact Sport

_**Chapter Four: Sightseeing is a Contact Sport**_

* * *

Ezekiel let out a yawn before opening his eyes. Blinking a few times to get used to the darkness he noticed the sleeping figures spread throughout the room and the one right next to him. After a moment of confusion it all came back.

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* * *

_

Once they had convinced the onboard staff to allow five people in the normally four person suite the sleeping arrangements had been easy.

_Chef Hatchet not surprisingly had laid immediate claim to the queen sized bed. Any possible complaint was instantly silenced at the sight of Chef in a pink halter sleep top, short shorts and an eye mask on top of his head._

_The younger males stared at the assistant in horror before rushing to the roll outs. Surprisingly Tyler and Noah had reached them first. That left Ezekiel and Harold with the pull out couch bed. "Just so you know...I am madly in love with LeShawna so this is strictly out of necessity."_

_Harold had explained and Ezekiel agreed. Though he was more then a bit perplexed by the jock's snickers and the sight of Noah smirking at them behind his book while muttering something about video cameras._

* * *

The homeschooler shook his toque covered head before carefully climbing out of bed taking great care not to disturb the still sleeping nerd. He repeated this process with Tyler and Noah as he slowly maneuvered his way to the balcony door.

Quietly he unlocked the door and stepped outside onto the small balcony. Outside the sky was just starting to lighten up and he could hear the rush of the ocean as the ship traveled through. Letting out a contented sigh he stared at the distant horizon.

His smile though immediately disappeared at the sight of wild green eyes suddenly popping up in front of him. Ezekiel gasped and took a step back in surprise at the figure now perched precariously on top of the bobbing railing.

"Izzy?"

"RAWR!!!!"

"AHHHHH!!!!"

* * *

Inside the suite the sound of the scream combined with a loud thump had caused an immediate chain reaction. Harold had promptly jumped to the floor and took up a defensive stance while whirling his num yo's.

Unfortunately he had forgotten to grab his glasses from the nearby table. Combined with the unfamiliar area, the auburn haired male ended up accidently tripping over Noah's discarded book. Harold let out a startled cry as his formable mad skills failed him. With a loud splash he landed in the hot tub in the corner.

Tyler meanwhile had sprung to his feet and stood at the ready on top of his bed for a few seconds. Without warning the cot legs suddenly gave out and the bed crashed onto the ground.

Unprepared for the action, the jock was sent flying forward and landed right on top of a very startled bookworm. Noah scowled and opened his mouth to complain, but froze when he heard an ominous creak.

"Oh you have got to be kid-" That was all the bookworm was able to say before his bed also gave up the ghost. Pushing Tyler to the ground Noah crawled off of the now broken bed. Looking around the room he scowled.

Chef was snoring loudly in bed with his earplugs jammed firmly in his ears, a shivering and soaking wet Harold was climbing out of the hot tub and Tyler stood up. Noah's scowl darkened as he noticed the giggling female lying on top of Ezekiel in a puppy dog like fashion.

"Alright who ordered the Izzy wake up call?!!"

* * *

"Seriously I don't know how the crazy bird does it. We're the floor above you guys for Einstein's sake." Noah complained absently taking the omelet the cook held out to him. Gwen rolled her eyes.

"I don't know and to be honest I really don't care. It's an Izzy thing and let's just leave it at that." The goth commented as she accepted her own plate. Noah smirked back. "Wiser words have never been spoken."

Without saying another word they made their way to their table where most of their group was already eating at. In another part of the restaurant Izzy in the buffet line had just reached for the last triple chocolate muffin.

"Come to Izzy Choco Delicious!" Izzy cooed as her fingers touched the muffin…just before it was snatched away. Izzy blinked as she noticed a little dark haired girl wearing a shirt with Courtney's picture plastered on it waving the muffin tauntingly at her.

Sinking her little teeth in the muffin the child smirked at the red head before sauntering away. Izzy lunged. Behind his unstable friend Ezekiel hurriedly dropped his own tray in his haste to grab Izzy. He barely managed to do so.

Holding onto her however was a challenge. The homeschooler let out a startled cry as he was unwillingly dragged forward. Seeing the struggle, Tyler decided to help restrain Izzy.

Back at the table Bridgette's eyes widened in shock. Especially when the little CIT supporter darted by the jock's feet causing him to be badly knocked off balance and he fell on Ezekiel causing him to lose his grip on Izzy.

"REVENGE!!! My Choco Delicious shall be avenged!!!" Izzy roared out as she chased after the obnoxious little girl. Bridgette winced before turning her attention to the know-it-all. "Should we go after her?"

Noah paused briefly his fork halfway up to his mouth as he raised an eyebrow. "Let's see…spend the next hour searching for an abnormally cheerful psycho, be late for disembarkment thus missing the tour we already paid for or shall we just sit here, continue to eat breakfast and pretend we don't know her?"

Dumbfounded looks was his answer and the group winced as they heard Izzy's shouts in the background followed by several crashes. "Yeah I'm voting for the second option." Noah drawled taking a bite of his omelet.

Gwen shook off the daze first and she smirked. "You're still mad at Courtney aren't you?" The bookworm shot her a venomous look and the goth girl nodded. "Yep…still mad." On the other side of the large table Lindsay scratched her head in confusion.

"So why is Nathan mad at Corma again?"

_

* * *

_

Today's Challenge is the ever popular puzzle challenge! Chris McClain announced cheerfully gesturing to the large painted squares on the forest floor. Heather frowned. "Newsflash…there are no puzzle pieces."

_The large grin on the sadistic host's face was of no reassurance. "Good question! And now for the answer! You have to FIND them! Which should be no problem for the Finders!" Chris laughed in glee ignoring the chorus of groans._

_Rubbing a tear from his eye he continued. The puzzle pieces are hidden all over camp! Red for the Finders and Green for the Trekkers! First team to find them all AND put the puzzle together wins Immunity and a movie night! Now get to it!"_

_Not surprisingly the Finders were ahead thanks to three members. Noah, Eva and Cody. Eva much to their shock was an avid puzzle buff. The strong female reluctantly admitted she had taken it up during Total Drama the Musical as a way to relieve stress._

_Cody had elaborated on that. Eva had been waiting by the Helipad of Losers as a red faced techno geek Cody descended his eyes wide with shock. The entire Helipad had been turned into a giant collage of HIM._

_The bear, his bold heroic swing on the vine to save Trent and Lindsay, leading the guy's alliance…heck even his brave yet foolish attempt at getting down Chris's skate park of doom. It was all there. _

_And it now explained Sierra's reaction. The fan stalker had dropped her high intensity binoculars and had screamed bloody murder. She then proceeded to chase around the rest of her team around the plane yelling about how they let an evil Sasquatch lay claim to HER man. _

"_Yeah…it explained a lot." Noah mused to himself as he walked back to his team's board with a piece in his hand. To his minor surprise the over competitive CIT had once again taken control of the team in her usual fashion…with an iron fist._

_The overachiever stood solely next to the half completed puzzle tapping her foot impatiently until she happened to notice the cube that he held. Instantly she raced forward and without so much as a thank you, yanked it out of his hand and proceeded to put the square….into the wrong place._

"_Wrong place Ms. CIT." Noah commented before reaching down to fix it. His hand was harshly slapped away. "I KNOW what I'm doing." Courtney scoffed before waving a hand in dismissal._

_Noah frowned and crossed his arms in annoyance. "If you knew what you were doing you would still have Cody and his iron woman working on the puzzle at the least. Speaking of which WHERE are they?"_

"_Your little wannabee boyfriend and the mountain gorilla are searching for the pieces. After all at this stage we only need one to put the puzzle together and it only makes sense for it to be me. After all I am the only one who had CIT training."_

_Punctuating her words, the bossy girl yanked away another cube from the approaching Trent with a smile. The smile disappeared when the piece was in turn yanked from her hands. Fire flared in her eyes and she spun around to face the deviant upstart._

"_A true leader knows when to lead and when to follow. And no one insults my FRIENDS. Consider your dictatorship of the Finders forthwith terminated." Noah declared harshly his own eyes like ice. Without another word he pushed past the openmouthed musician and CIT._

_Courtney's silence was brief and vengeance burned in her eyes. Letting out a cry of rage, the CIT tackled the disobedient know-it-all sending him flying on top of the puzzle. The scattered pieces had eventually led to the Killer Finders' defeat._

* * *

"_Voted off third again. You should have been more of a team player." _

Noah snapped out of the memory and his eyes narrowed briefly in annoyance. "I don't get mad Gwen…I get even, especially when it comes to my acquaintances. Now if you excuse me I'm going to get ready to go ashore as it were. See you downstairs."

* * *

Several hours later Noah was in a much better mood. The tour through the island had been very informative and filled with a seemingly endless amount of detail. His favorite combination. For the first time since joining the god forsaken show the bookworm felt at ease.

Not even the approaching trip at the shopping market could put him down. If anything the venue had improved his mood for more then one reason. With ease the cynic stepped calmly aside letting Tyler tumble by.

Ignoring the thumps of the jock going down the stairs, Noah continued to stare at the shirts in his hands in debate. "I still think you'd look better in the purple one Nathan." Noah frowned and turned to face the clueless blonde.

"T-Shirts are something the triplets would wear not me. And while we're on the topic, I am shopping for my 8 brothers and sisters and for my parents. And I might as well just get the Wonder Duo their infernal snow globes while I'm at it."

Lindsay clapped her hands in delight before grabbing his hand. Before the wide eyed bookworm could protest, the buxom blonde had led him into store after store searching for the perfect gifts.

* * *

Noah wasn't the only one who needed assistance. Bridgette shook her head in amusement as the taller nerd dashed all over the market looking for items worthy of his chocolate goddess. Special chocolate and perfume were only the start.

"Hey Bridgette would this be the perfect gift for LeShawna? Or will this be the perfect gift for LeShawna?" Harold questioned holding up tropical dress after tropical dress. Without waiting for a reply to his question he continued.

"The red really brings out the gorgeous luster of those choc…olate al…monds she calls eyes, but then again the greenish blue one really accents her perfect behind…then again there is the black one that amplifies her delicate nature…"

Bridgette shook her head again with a smile. "Oh yeah…we'll be here for awhile." She mused to herself greatly enjoying the sight of her flustered friend. Inwardly she thanked Lindsay for the sudden trip. She was greatly enjoying herself.

* * *

Ezekiel wished he could have said the same. Unlike the rest of his group he and Izzy had bowed out of the sightseeing tour. Or rather Izzy had discovered something of great interest and had dashed off in a hurry before they could board the waiting bus.

Naturally he quickly raced after in an attempt to keep the red head's would be chaos under control...not that it would matter in the end. Falling off bikes, colliding with walls and other tourists…without a doubt he would be sore tomorrow.

Finally Izzy stopped her mad dash through town. "There it is! There it is!" Izzy cheered happily pointing to a large pyramid in the distance with a long slide coming out of it. As they watched a tiny doll sized figure came down it and disappeared just as quickly.

"The Leap of Faith…a 6 story plunge right through a shark tank! Woo hoo!!! Izzy cheered happily completely unaware of the look of terror gracing her best friend's face. "We're gonna do wot eh?!"

"Climb up the giant pyramid and go sliding down several stories high right into the shark tank! And hey if we end up surviving we can do it again! And if we're lucky we get to pet the stingrays! This is going to be sooo much fun Zeke!"

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: Okay longer wait and I battled with the loss of inspiration, but next chapter is finished!

Quick notes Noah having triplets as family is in my other story 23 presents. Same goes for the little brat girl. I should come up with a name for her…any ideas anyone?

Other stuff The Leap of Faith actually exists it is at the Atlantis hotel in the Bahamas same for the stingrays. Pretty cool hotel. And there are hot tubs in the large suites on cruise ships. ;)

Other Other stuff my Ezekiel pumpkin came in 2nd in the TDI blog contest! Major shock…I thought Noah would win! I wasn't surprised on the winners, though they could have been more fair on the costume one…yeah I'm annoyed a cosplayer teen one instead of a little kid. I mean how can you tell a little kid they lost? Yeah could have done that a different way.

So onwards to the next chapter! Might take awhile…my inspiration has suffered hugely do to the injustice that is TDM. I mean there are THREE different stories going on there! And all has Zeke (also known as my muse) as the butt or the nonexistent character AGAIN.

I can't tell you how mad I am at that…but I'll battle onwards! Necro hope you liked and Winter honest and true I will get back to Commandeers! Loss of inspiration is a terrible terrible thing.

Thanks for the reviews! :)

Imagi


	5. The Motion of the Ocean

_**Chapter Five: The Motion of the Ocean**_

* * *

Bridgette's face burned as she left the pool area, the plastic trophy of the cruise ship clenched in one hand. Without a doubt that had been the most embarrassing thing she had ever had the misfortune to be involved in. Though vomiting on stage during Season One was a close second.

Besides her, Izzy pranced happily also carrying her own gold painted award. "That was just sooo much fun!" Izzy cheered as they left the pool deck and headed for the nearby elevator. Bridgette looked at her companion in disbelief before shaking her head.

Of course only Izzy would think the Lady Swim Competition aka stuff as many pieces of fruit as you can into your swimsuit before the other competitors while surrounded by cheering people to be enjoyable.

"I still can't believe you tied with me when I had the pineapple!" The red head announced with a grin while wiggling her butt in emphasis. "I think I still have bite marks from it! Here! Wanna see?"

The blonde blanched and forced a weak smile on her face. "That's…great Izzy, but I'd rather not." Izzy just shrugged. A bell dinged and both girls entered the now open elevator. Izzy pressed a button causing the elevator to travel downwards.

"Shouldn't we change before eating lunch?" Bridgette questioned as the elevator doors opened revealing one of the ship's restaurants. Izzy ignored the question and bounded right up to the restaurant hostess.

"I'm sorry ladies, but no swimwear allowed in the-"

"Oh we already know that. Hey! Is Pacho there? Izzy needs him to make a Birthday cake for my Zekey friend for his Birthday tonight!" Bridgette blinked and the hostess took out a sheet of paper that already had names written on it.

While the lady scanned the paper, the ponytailed blonde turned to Izzy in surprise. "You mean today is Ezekiel's Birthday?" Izzy grinned happily as she rocked back and forth on her feet. "Nope!"

"But if it's not his Birthday then why-"

"Because my Zeke didn't get to celebrate HIS Birthday since meanie CIT voted him off. But that's why they call them surprise parties! And Zekey won't be expecting it so it really WILL be a surprise!"

"I'll say." Bridgette muttered quietly under her breath her own eyes wide at the unexpected revelation. Just then the hostess looked up and nodded. It turned out that one cake was available due to cancelation. Strawberry topped with whip cream icing.

Bridgette smiled and was about to accept the offer when Izzy let out an angry hiss. Seconds later the red head let out a tirade of foreign words. The surfer shook her head in amazement. Since when did Izzy know Spanish?"

* * *

"Woah...Cool!" Harold said in awe staring at the video in front of him. Both he and Ezekiel were sitting in the computer lounge area of the ship watching a video advertising the Leap of Faith on one of the computer screens. However the boys' opinions on it greatly differed.

"It wasn't cood it was hot eh." Ezekiel stated glaring at the screen at the cheering people screaming in excitement as they descended. Harold chuckled. "Cool is another word for Awesome. And that looks Awesome!"

"That was noot awesome that was real scary eh!" The homeschooler said his body involuntarily shaking from the mere memory as he explained to his friend the terrifying encounter…

_

* * *

_

3 Days Ago

_**Temporarily Off Limits to Public. **_

_One of the many large signs proclaimed in big red letters while a no nonsense guard stood watch over the path in wait for the competitors of The Incredible Dash to approach._

_And soon they did. Each carrying a special sheet of paper, the pairs smiled in relief as they dashed by intent on completing the challenge. The short brunet of the last team was less then thrilled, but faithfully charged after a wild red head._

_It would be several minutes later that the guard would realize there was one team too many…_

_Izzy in the meantime dashed headlong towards the pyramid. "Hurry up Zeke!" The crazy girl called out as she effortlessly sprinted up the structure and came to a halt at the top. The older couple already there temporarily stopped their verbal battle and gaped in shock._

_Oblivious to their stares, Izzy promptly pulled off her green top revealing a bright purple bikini top patterned with a scaly texture. Removing the Tarzan styled skirt, the red head proudly showed off the matching bottoms to the startled lifeguard and the couple, the latter finally reacting._

"_Hey you're not on the show!" The guy demanded while the girl nodded with a frown. Izzy laughed. "Maybe not on YOU'RE show." Izzy grinned happily with her normal unstable grin on her face. Before the couple could comment on this they were interrupted by someone panting heavily for breath._

"_Zekey! You made it!" Izzy said happily running over to the gasping brunet. Still breathing heavily Ezekiel absently looked up at his best friend before his eyes widened in shock. The red head grinned wickedly and struck a pose. "Zekey like Izzy's new snake skin bikini?" _

_Ezekiel nodded dumbly before a thought hit him. "Wait snake skin? You did noot-"_

_Izzy rolled her eyes before grinning. "Snakey is still at the hotel, but he gave Izzy a vacation present and Izzy made a new bikini out of his molted skin!" The homeschooler nodded simply more then used to the unpredictability that is Izzy._

_Other people though never took it well and the lifeguard and the other show couple were no exception. Ezekiel finally sighed. "We're from Total Drama eh. Izzy is wild and a loot of fun and I…well…still got loots to learn aboot the real world. Oh and I'm Ezekiel eh."_

"_Yeah yeah enough with the back story! Pants off, Trunks on! Izzy wants to slide now!"_

_It hadn't taken long to persuade the couple or the lifeguard to allow Izzy to go. However she refused to go until he went. A firm push later and a terrified Ezekiel flew down the long slide screaming bloody murder. _

* * *

"The mountains and the lengths we climb for the ones we love." Harold said wisely. The homeschooler blinked before nodding. "Well yeah. Izzy was the first one to give me another chance after the ummm…Well you know eh."

Ezekiel commented his face pink from embarrassment and shame. The taller boy nodded solemnly. Three years had past since the homeschooler's epic mistake, but the grudges some of the other campers had held continued to last.

Shaking his head of the dark memory, Harold quickly changed the subject. "So when are you and Izzy going out?"

* * *

Through bites of her low cal chicken salad, Lindsay had noticed "Brenna" and "Iris" entering the restaurant and had been more then happy to wave them over to her booth, though she did scold them for having a bikini luncheon without inviting her.

The bombshell's annoyance faded at the mention of the spontaneous surprise party. "Oh yay! I just love Birthday parties! I hope it's not Tyler's though. I mean what kind of girlfriend would I be if I forgot the day the stork brought him from heaven?"

Lindsay said with a flourish. Izzy nodded happily while Bridgette's own hand covered her lips her cheeks flushed pink with amusement. Unaware Lindsay continued on. "I wonder if that nice bear in the Sunset Sally room downstairs will give us some of his balloons for the party?"

* * *

Ezekiel scratched his toque in confusion at Harold's question. "When are we going oot?" Harold grinned back in response and waited patiently for the shorter teen's response.

"Well we did go oot on the beach at the resort after we went down that slide and after we finished signing all those disclaimer papers joost in case that hoost decided to use them. And Izzy thought she saw Maybelle Gertie and Bertie's coosin in that big tank. Did you knoo she's a clownfish? Izzy said their distant cousins on their mom's soide eh."

"Uh…Zeke? That's not exactly what I meant."

* * *

"This is for my Zeke's belated surprise party his day Izzy's way party so the cake has to be super duper special! With three layers…chocolate and with blue and green icing! Oh! And candy sprinkles shaped like bears! That's Zekey's favorite." The red head announced happily to Pacho with her mouth full of ketchup and garlic fries.

Bridgette was torn between cringing and smiling at the fun loving girl's obvious crush. She settled for the latter with just a bit of playful teasing mixed in. "So…Izzy…you and Homeschool."

"ZEKE!" Izzy spit out along with her fries before diving back into her plate with all the manners of a rabid Doberman. "I think I lost my appetite." Lindsay whimpered pushing her salad to the side while Bridgette did the same with her tofu burger.

* * *

"And then the next day on that other island Izzy was searching all over the place for chocolate jalapeno dipped pickles, orange spandex and bright green leggings. Oh! And a tropic dress with bears and snakes on it. We found everything boot the leggings. Boot she's my best friend so I goot to foind them foor her eh."

"So…you guys are just friends. Best friends that borders between lovable insanity, crazy mad skills, shy as well as super flirty. Could go out with each other in a heartbeat, but the force conspires against it and you both have a serious yet possibly unrequited crush on another."

Harold analyzed nodding his head in acceptance. Ezekiel stared at the taller male with uncertainty. "Ummm…yes?"

* * *

"Sure I like like him and I could totally date him, but then I wouldn't have the totally fun best friend that you can call anytime! And one who's almost always ready for one of Izzy's spontaneous trips away from her boyfriend/ future spouse/soul mate. Like take me and Graham Cracker!"

"Graham Cracker?"

"Uh huh. He's my before the show boyfriend. And he's this close to dropping the restraining order and my Zeke already said he'd bring extra raw steaks so Graham doesn't have to worry about being attacked by killer animals this time!"

"Wait…this time? Please tell me you're joking." Bridgette begged. The ketchup grin on the red head's face proved otherwise.

"Of course not! As I've told my Zeke over and over if you go on a date you have to be creative! Go to the zoo and make friends with the gators! Go to the ballpark for bungee jumping! And most importantly make it a group date whenever possible."

"Izzy…that is the-"

The surfer girl's words were cut off when Izzy slung a ketchup covered hand over her shoulder. "So what do you think Bridgey? Care to sneak onto TDW with me and Zeke when we get back and play midnight tag with Fuzzy Wuzzums, Gertie and Bertie and everything else that goes bump in the night?"

* * *

Well the good news is Bridgette is now unattached and therefore open for you to sweep her off her feet. The bad news is it was a bad breakup and that takes time to heal." Harold said calmly as they walked down one of the long hallways.

"So…"

"That means throw the Rapper tips, Chris tips and everything you overheard from Geoff, Justin and Duncan out the window. I mean GOSH! Why did you even bother? Those IDIOTS have NO idea about how to treat a lady with respect."

"And you do?" Harold grinned and pointed a finger toward himself. "I after many years of intense study, bullying and class ridicule have now mastered girl whispering. Not to mention I have a girlfriend.

The farm raised male slowly nodded. "It would be noice to talk to her withoot running foor my loife. It would be better to joost talk to her in the first place eh."

"Not to worry! Under the careful tutelage of Sensei Harold you shall soon be able to conquer your fear of approaching women who are not Izzy. But first we must conquer lunch. I'm starving!"

* * *

"What hold on…you're telling me that Ezekiel is still crushing on me?" Bridgette said her eyes wide with shock. Lindsay next to her gasped and Izzy grinned broadly.

"Yep! You're like the Gwen in the Gwdy relationship! Or actually the Trgwdy. Or is it the Trendy? You know for the Trent, Gwen, Cody love triangle? Of course Gwen is now available and Cody is dating the strong member of Team Escope so I guess that really doesn't work now..."

"Oh my gosh! I soooo remember that!" Lindsay chimed in enthusiastically. "Vela was just so like GRRR!!! I'm going to break you in half! And… that dirty rotten Cora tricked me and I missed out on Season 3! And she went on and on about how that new girl Serena was clinging to Colby like some kind of sucker bus."

Izzy broke down into laughter as the dimwitted Barbie continued on. "So then I was like Vela you sooo have a crush on Colby! And she was like I DO NOT! And I was like YOU DO TOO! And if you don't do something you're going to wind up NOT being the one Colby's going to make out with in the Communal Washrooms at camp!"

The messy wild girl let out a cheer. "So you got Eva fired up, took her to the latest helipad where she proclaimed her love in blushes, hugs and a fifty thousand "Cody is the Greatest" custom puzzle!"

"And she spent like every hour, day AND night before vote off working on it! It's a good thing Colby was voted off when he was. I don't think it would have worked as well as it did if it was someone else." Lindsay commented her brow scrunched with thought.

"Uh huh. And when Sierra was voted off three weeks later she immediately went on a Cody hunt only to find Cova making out on one of the work out benches in the weight room! But enough about that! Bridgey do you know what will make my Zeke really happy? You spend the rest of today distracting him!"

Bridgette's eyes widened even more. "You want me to do what?"

"Distract Zekey! Go swimming, share a sundae, or hold your breath underwater until people start screaming for help and the really cute lifeguard jumps in to save you and just when he leans down to give you mouth to mouth you pounce!"

Once again off track, Izzy promptly demonstrated her attack on the lifeguard on a passing boy. His girlfriend was less then pleased. Ignoring the girl's ranting, Izzy released the dazed boy and continued.

"Oh yeah Graham just screamed his head off and I got banned from the pool and then at the movie theaters and the roller ring, nursing home, ice cream parlor…what can I say? I just seem to FIND him!"

Izzy finished gleefully letting out an evil chuckle. The boy, his girlfriend, Bridgette and Lindsay exchanged disturbed looks. While the former quickly vacated, the latter looked around the half full room for a distraction of their own. They found it in the form of two.

They weren't the only ones. With a delighted yell the wild red head latched on Bridgette's arm and pulled the ponytailed blonde forward. "Izzy! What are you doing?" Bridgette hissed only to let out a cry of her own at the sudden shove propelling her towards a certain misunderstood homeschooler.

Ezekiel's eyes widened and without thinking caught the bikini clad blonde his face turning a brilliant shade of red in the process. Beside him Harold grinned and gave him a thumbs up while a grinning Izzy and a happily clapping Lindsay approached.

"Hi My Zeke! Bridgey wants a sundae at Benny and Gerry's! Then she wants to go swimming, ice skating-"

As Izzy rambled on Bridgette face palmed. "Thank you Izzy." The surfer mumbled under her breath. "Thank you very much."

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: Hey guess what! I'm BAAAACK!!!

First off Incredible Dash...parody of Amazing Race, yes there are ice skating rings on cruise ships, the bear Lindsay is talking about kid's area my story..don't think Sunset Sally is on a cruise ship, the world record of the largest puzzle ever is 25,000 pieces currently, Trendy I think I'm the first to classify the Trent, (TR) Gwen, (EN) Cody (DY) one sided triangle as such and the rest do I really need to explain? ;)

Oh and the Lady Swim Competition? Yeah…I did that. *blush* I looked at it this way. If I'm going to embarrass myself in public I'm going to win. And I did. Good thing I was a good sport and did it rather then otherwise…Footage from that was aired on the room T.V's REPEATEDLY. Remember! Anything involving a female and a body of water on a cruise ship…is ALWAYS THE SAME so Beware. And NO I am NOT doing THAT again. :P

To Necro as always enjoy! :)

Also I'm going to try to finish this story AND Winter's Commandeers of Wawanakwa first.

23: The Road to Total Drama Retro is on the BACKBURNER. Sorry but I'm not updating it unless I have at least 10 reviews. Opinions matter and influence how the story goes. It takes only one random suggestion to get me on a writing kick. Without it I run solely on sugar, Pepsi, Ezzy stories and music for energy…never lasts long and with it goes my inspiration.

I am still accepting possible cameos for TRTTDR though.

Also congrats to the real ending of TDA (there is two) and the OFFICIAL winner on ON DEMAND AND ITUNES…BETH!!!

No popular contest required!

Now end the debate over Season 3 and just tell us Ezekiel IS ON AND he gets his redemption, acceptance, friendship and romance and I'll be happy. :)

And as always thanks for the reviews everyone! :)

Imagi


	6. Much Ado about the Chef

_**Chapter Six: Much Ado about the Chef**_

_

* * *

_

Last Night

_7:00 p.m._

"Oh yeah baby! Steak, potatoes and a little lovin...Breakfast of Champions!" Tyler declared happily. As he stuck a piece of steak in his mouth his eyes rolled skyward. "Sooo…Good…" The jock moaned in delight.

On his right side Lindsay giggled in amusement while on his left Noah scowled. "Uncouth." Noah muttered under his breath before proceeding to take a more refined mouthful of the evening's entrée.

Across the table the goth hid a smile at the jock's antics and then a second one as she watched Izzy once again being held back from once again attacking the little Courtney fan girl by the ever watchful Ezekiel.

_

* * *

_

Though the random seating was a chance to get to know some of the other passengers aboard the ship, the Total Drama crew preferred to stick together during dinner time. Also the tables they usually chose meant that no one else could sit with them ensuring a relatively autograph and picture free dinner.

_But like anything there were exceptions…and long lists of hopefuls vying for the chance to sit around or at the Stars table. And tonight that number was 7. A single father with three overly delighted older kids and little Devi with her parents._

* * *

Izzy naturally had been less then pleased with that arrangement. "You forgot the L!" Izzy yelled out as she once again tried to attack the little "angel" decked in a frilly purple dress. Her best friend and Bridgette quickly intervened.

"Izzy you said you wanted to dress up. And you wanted a nice formal professional stuffy picture of the whole TDW cruise crew for your scrapbook remember?" Bridgette reminded the red head as she gestured around the table.

With the exception of most of their passenger tablemates, each of the 8 cast members and Chef were dressed to the nines, the boys in elegant tuxedos and the girls and Chef in dresses all in different shades of the rainbow.

"In addition our current attire was rented at the start of our voyage or have you forgotten about the hours spent searching for an outfit that matched Lindsay's new hair ornament or one that looked decent enough on our show guardian that wouldn't scar us for the rest of our natural born lives?" Noah drawled raising an eyebrow.

In response, Chef glared darkly at the infamous know it all. "Is it a crime for a man to want to look pretty?!" The show assistant demanded gazing at the other table occupants as if silently daring them to disagree.

Fortunately no one did. Izzy bared her teeth threatening at Devi, but reluctantly sat back down with Ezekiel's prodding. Gwen shook her head again. "Any luck that camera guy will be coming around soon, but somehow I doubt it."

"Speaking of luck…who's up for taking Lucky Louie's jeep tour on our last full day?" Harold interjected cheerfully only to cower slightly at the sight of a massive finger in his face. "It...Is… NOT… the…LAST day…unless I say it is."

"Chef commented firmly. While Harold gulped and nodded quickly in hopes of the dangerous digit being removed, Noah scoffed. "Someone's in denial." The bookworm deadpanned as he took another bite of his dinner.

_

* * *

_

Girls' Cabin

_6:00 a.m._

_Present_

"The last day on the last island…seems like it was only yesterday." Bridgette sighed as she dressed for the day. Gwen nodded in agreement. "I know. It hardly feels like 6 glorious Total Drama FREE days went by, but the signs are there.

The goth girl commented gesturing to their cabin. Most of the interior of the cabin suite was filled with bags and bags of purchases. "Speaking of which…Lindsay how are you going to get all of THIS back home? Federal Express?"

"Don't be silly Greta. That's what Daddy's plane is for!" The buxom blonde answered back cheerfully her voice echoing from inside the bathroom. Both surfer and goth exchanged a look. Before they could comment there was a loud pound on their cabin door.

_

* * *

_

Ship Hallway

_5 minutes prior_

"I can't believe I'm saying this but I miss Izzy's wakeup calls." Noah said in his usual monotone as he and the rest of the boys followed their show guardian out their door and down one of the many hallways.

In response Chef spun around. "YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY SOLDIER?!" The camp cook yelled out making the know-it-all jump, Ezekiel shake and the other boys wince in sympathy.

"No Master Chief sir!"

"Good! Now march double time! Hup Two! Hup Two!" Chef yelled out forcing his current charges to quickly descend the stairs to the next level, walk briskly to the right and down another long hallway.

Ezekiel mentally thanked Izzy for the forced endurance tests he endured practically every single day since he had befriended the unpredictable redhead. For some reason Chef was in a very volatile mood and unlike Noah he was terrified of making it worse.

Walking down yet another corridor Chef finally stopped in front of one of the doors and proceeded to bang on it. "THE TIME IS SIX HUNDRED AND ONE LADIES! I EXPECT YOU ALL TO BE READY TO GO BY SIX HUNDRED AND-"

The door opened and Gwen and Bridgette stepped out. "Lindsay will be right out." Bridgette commented with a bright yet nervous smile. The dark glare that Chef gave the blonde caused Bridgette to quickly race back inside.

"_But I haven't even dried my hair!"_

"_It can air dry!"_

"_Duh! That's why I need the hair dryer!"_

"_Lindsay for your own safety we need to be out of here now!"_

The verbal battle inside the room went on followed by the slamming of drawers and a scream or two before the door was reopened and Bridgette raced back outside dragging a still protesting Lindsay behind her. Lindsay smiled sheepishly at the guardian.

"Oh hi Chief Hatcher!"

"WE'RE ONE SHORT! WHERE IS PSYCHO BARBIE?!"

"But we don't have a psychic! It's just me and Greta, and Brenna and Iris and-"

"WHERE DID IZZY GO?!"

"Ummmm…Oh! Hey maybe Ethan knows! He's her boyfriend right? But then again he's dating Brenna or was that Gerald? But didn't he make Brenna cry? Yeah! He totally did! And then Chief Hatcher glared at Gerald as Brenna cried in Hatcher's arms and then-"

* * *

Chef's bad mood had continued through the tour through the latest island, through the shops and by mid afternoon the cast explorers were beyond exhausted. No one dared to speak having learned early on it was best to struggle and stay silent.

When Chef Hatchet finally took a short break to use the john, the teens took the opportunity to collapse on a nearby bench. "I can't move!" Lindsay whined sprawled on her front. Ezekiel nodded in agreement. "I doon't loike Corpooral Chef eh."

Harold sighed. "I don't get it. This whole trip was meant to be a vacation from all the stress, backstabbing and the Craziness of Total Drama and now all of a sudden we're back to square one. It doesn't add up."

Gwen's eyes widened. Ignoring her exhaustion the goth sat back up. "You're right! I don't know how it happened, but somehow something or someone upset him. And now we have to deal with the mood swings."

"So that shouldn't be too hard to figure out…right Lindsay?" Lindsay blinked. "What shouldn't I figure out Brenna?" The surfer's eyes shot open in disbelief. "You're kidding right?"

Lindsay shook her head while Bridgette sighed. "You're the one who solved the WHO "killed" Chris mystery on the train back on Season 2 so if there's anyone on this ship next to Noah and Harold who can solve this it's you."

"Is that the one where Beth tied with Derek and they were going to split the money, but then Cora said no way and brought her big lawyer guy in to declare Derek the winner but the lawyer guy he messed up and declared Cora the winner instead, though she didn't even make it to Season 2 AND she was KICKED OFF! Which of course resulted in show legal action that tied the money up in court until the guy in the black robes and wig decides who gets the money? Or was it Season 3 where Sally won and wanted to share it with Kally, but Chris said no resulting in another court battle thingy?"

"You had it right the first time." Harold said with a frown before putting a finger to his chin in thought. Speaking of mysteries why do you think Noah and Tyler backed out of the tour? And what do you think there doing now anyway?"

* * *

With a confident smile Noah held up the colored marker in his hand, but his smile faded as his rival across the way held up his own and in a mocking tone quoted a higher number. The bookworm let out a sigh and placed the marker back down in defeat.

_**Going once…Going twice…The gentleman in red has raised the bid to-**_

Noah blinked his calm eyes as large as dollar plates as he glanced over at Tyler who proudly waved the marker in the air like he was cheering for his favorite sports team. "Tyler what are you doing?!" Noah hissed out.

"Making sure you get the painting with the lines all over it!" Tyler replied back as he once again waved the marker and then again as Noah's rival clenched his own fist and shook it. Noah frowned.

"And what good will that do if you don't have the money to do so?!" Tyler waved the marker dismissively. "My dad's a sportscaster. Now are you going to hush up with the nerd pride for one moment and let the jock handle it?"

Another wave of the marker caused Noah's rival to let out a loud curse as he waved his own sign. Tyler frowned at him. Deliberately he raised his number sign only for the other guy to do the same. The jock scowled.

"Look dude…my opposite bud has a crush on a girl who has been eyeing that painting EVERY SINGLE TIME she's passed it like 400 times since this cruise started and my bud here has been waiting for this auction and for her NOT to be around and I blew off time to spend with my Lindsay Bear to help him out and I don't care how high your jack the price I'm gonna beat it cause that line painting is going to this guy right here! And I'm going to pay for it! So what do you think about that huh?!"

"I think I don't know you." Noah muttered burying his head in his arms.

* * *

"Hey! It's that Globe Hollywood building! Now Izzy can use her ticket!" Izzy cheered out pulling out a faded and worn ticket out of the cutout in her top with her free hand. The other was firmly wrapped around her best friend.

_

* * *

_

She had just received the rainbow colored treat when she noticed her fellow vacationers were not far away performing jumping jacks and push ups on the beach. Grinning, the red head changed her order.

"_Hey guys! I got snow cones!" Izzy commented cheerfully holding out the tray to her exhausted comrades. With the other she held a much larger yet pink version to a very stunned Chef who finally smiled for the first time that day. _

* * *

When Izzy eagerly pointed out the restaurant wildly perched once again on Ezekiel's shoulders, they feared a relapse. To their surprise and relief for whatever reason Chef agreed to Izzy's request to eat at Globe Hollywood.

"I don't know what was in that snow cone you gave Chef, but I don't care. I'll take Vacation Chef over Camp Cook Chef and definitely Crazy General Chef any day." Gwen said leaning back in the booth with a sigh.

The others nodded in agreement. "Well now that military maneuvers and drills are done we can go back to figuring out this mystery." Harold announced before suddenly pulling out a magnifying glass. "So…time to find out whodunit!"

"But how can we do that? We don't even know why Chef went all military psycho in the first place!"

"Or why he didn't eat his slice of Ethan's late birthday cake last night. I mean even I had to have a piece even though I knew I totally had to be in the gym the next day, but with this army workout…*gasp* It's like I never had those yummy two pieces in the first place!"

"Wait! Lindsay back up…Chef didn't eat his cake? What else did you notice?" Bridgette prodded earning a smile from the bubbly girl. "Well Ethan was trying to keep Iris away from Evil and you were looking at Ethan and-"

_

* * *

_

Last Night

"Izzy! Look there's the camera guy eh!" Ezekiel said relieved while the red head in his arms quickly turned her head. "Great! Okay everybody who's dressed in stuffy fancy clothing and on TDI get ready…we are hijacking the camera guy!"

Not surprisingly with all nine members of the Total Drama cast posing against the wall with a photographer snapping multiple pictures, it hadn't taken long for word to get around the ship.

Five pictures had turned to fifty as fan after fan had taken advantage of the photo opportunity. Begrudgingly and happily the stars complied, though a strict 10 minute session was put in place and firmly enforced. They did want to finish eating dinner after all.

It had scarcely been a minute after the plates were pushed away that it happened. The lights in the restaurant went out. Before anyone could become truly alarmed, there was the familiar glow of flickering candles followed by singing.

Ezekiel's eyes widened in shock as the waiters and waitresses surrounded their table and proceeded to put a larger then normal cake in front of him while the lights came back on enabling him to look at the cake.

His eyes widened even more as he took in the blue and green icing artistically swirled together reminding him very much of the ocean water though he doubted ever finding candy bears swimming in the real ocean.

"Go ahead and make a wish." Bridgette said with a smile. Grinning Ezekiel did just that completely unaware of the cameras flashing constantly from the other tables. Taking the knife, he carefully cut the first slice.

With a broad smile on his face Ezekiel passed the slice over to Bridgette and proceeded to cut pieces for Izzy, Chef and the rest of the cast. "You guys can have a piece too eh!" He said cheerfully to their table guests.

Izzy growled as Devi received a piece, but something out of the corner of her eye caught her attention. Racing from the room, she quickly reappeared holding a large group of balloons. Grinning happily she announced the game.

"Izzy doesn't condone Birthday spankings so she's come up with something even better! Birthday Kisses!"

"Birthday woMURPH!" Ezekiel's eyes went wide as his best friend kissed him enthusiastically on the mouth before letting go. Removing a green balloon from the bundle she carried, Izzy proceeded to tie it to Ezekiel's wrist.

"My Zeke is 18! Which means…17 more kisses! Kiss my Zeke and then give him a balloon! Just so we don't go over 18…that's bad luck on a B-Day party you know!" The wild girl explained grinning broadly at the others.

Gwen blinked before she slowly smirked. "Sure. Why not." Pulling a teal balloon from the bunch she just as quickly leaned in just as Ezekiel recovered from the shock of the first kiss. Now completely dazed he slumped in his chair.

Lindsay clapped her hands excitedly causing the pink balloon in her hands to almost float off. Jumping in the air she caught the string. "I got it! What was I supposed to do again?"

"Kiss the Birthday Zeke!"

"Hey wait a minute!"

Tyler protested before letting out a cry as his girlfriend leaned in to kiss the shorter brunet. Noah raised an eyebrow. "One its Izzy…Two she and Ezekiel are as strange as it seems best friends. Three…Romantically he still wants Bridgette and Four Judging from the amount of balloons he has now he has now been kissed by at least 10 girls. I doubt that he'll remember half of them."

"12…13…14!" Izzy cheered as the last girl gave her yellow balloon to her dazed best friend. Another of the fans reached for one of the light blue balloons in her hand only for Izzy to snatch them away.

"Sorry, but blue is Bridgette's!" Izzy insisted before handing the rest of the balloons over to the startled surfer girl. Amidst the entire craziness in the restaurant that only Izzy could create, only one person saw Chef walk off.

* * *

"And then the show afterwards that he wanted to see he sooo didn't even show up!" Lindsay finished throwing her hands up in the air.

"So…Ezekiel…how many kisses do you remember?" Noah drawled smirking as he shoot the homeschooler a pointed look. Ezekiel turned a brilliant shade of red as he muttered out the answer. "What was that? We couldn't quite hear you."

Ezekiel dropped his head downwards so his hat hid his face. "Izzy, Gwen, Lindsay and Bridgette's. Doon't kill me eh!"

Nodding in satisfaction, the cynic turned towards the jock. "See. Eighteen girls and he only remembered four of them."

"But he remembered kissing Lindsay Bear!"

"Ezekiel likes someone else."

"He kissed Lindsay!"

In the other booth Ezekiel sank lower and lower in embarrassment while Bridgette did the same, Tyler and Noah continued the verbal battle with Izzy watching eagerly, Lindsay looked on in confusion, Gwen shook her head and Harold…pulled out a mini keyboard.

The triumphant sounds of the device gained everyone's attention as the nerd opened his mouth. "I have successfully solved this mystery of MOO...TIVE!" The auburn haired male declared proudly before playing his keyboard again before proceeding to explain.

"Judging from the bits and pieces both vocalized and remembered, Chef didn't eat his cake last night. He also left Ezekiel's belated surprise party AND he didn't come to the show afterwards even though he wanted to see it."

"And this means what exactly?"

Harold grinned broadly at Gwen's disinterested question. "The person behind Chef Hatchet's bad mood is none other then…EZEKIEL!"

As the others gasped and Ezekiel turned white, Harold continued. "Ezekiel unbeknownst to him received a surprise Birthday party to make up for the one denied to him before on TDW. And at Courtney's party, Ezekiel was the only one who didn't wish her Happy Birthday."

Bridgette froze from the realization. "And he only did so when Duncan forced him…and the cake! Ezekiel only took one bite before shoving it away! I thought…it was because he was upset over the vote off…but now…"

"But knoo the same thing happened to Chef! Oor is gooing to happen…oor is happening…hey anyone knoo when his Birthday is eh?" Ezekiel commented scratching his head in confusion. The other castmates just shrugged.

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: WHEW! Finished another chapter! I swear the hardest thing to do is to get started and inspiration works from there.

Anyway Globe Hollywood is a parody of Planet Hollywood…did I really need to explain that? Uh well. Also came up with the name for my little adorable angel/devil little girl who appears in more then one of my story...Devi. :D

And though I hate TDA with the passion of a thousand suns for not including Zeke and turning the DRAMA into Total Duncan and Courtney Action I couldn't resist the mystery jab.

So alright 3 Birthday's covered and 1 to go…this story is almost done! And Necro it was BEFORE YOUR next B-Day! I'm improving! :D

Again reminder…NOT UPDATING 23: The Road to Total Drama Retro without 10 reviews…

And still accepting Pen Pals for My Name is Ezekiel. No Stalker, Dark Dark, Killers…anything NOT impropriate for a TDI show I'm not accepting.

Thanks for the reviews! And Necro as always hope you enjoy! :)

Imagi


	7. Crazy Antics, Castles and Cake, Oh My!

**_Chapter Seven: _Crazy Antics, Castles and Cake, Oh My!**

* * *

"OF COURSE THEY'RE DYSFUNCTIONAL! THEY'RE ON TOTAL DRAMA FOR PETE SAKES! THAT SHOW WOULD MAKE ANYONE CRAZY!"

Chef Hatchet's voice boomed out from the near empty bar area where he had been since the performance in the theater had ended much earlier this evening. Taking another sip from his brightly colored drink, he continued his conversation with the bar tender.

"Maybe I'm overreacting, I mean they DID choose me over Chris for the trip guardian and it was nice they threw Homeschool the surprise party and the Bookworm DID give Head Soldier that painting she's been eyeing...all wrapped up like a birthday present…wide eyed look of disbelief and joy…-"

The show cook sniffed a little in remembrance, before his face darkened once more. "-BUT DARN IT! HOMESCHOOL'S BIRTHDAY WAS THE WEEK BEFORE THIS CRUISE STARTED! AND BOOKWORM COULD HAVE WAITED! Instead of leaving ME to think that-"

Yanking out the pink umbrella and straw from the glass, Chef proceeded to down the rest of the drink. Slamming it down on the counter he opened his mouth again to speak, only to sway a bit. The bar tender shook his head before summoning someone to escort the patron back to his room.

_

* * *

_

Most people weren't even aware that the ship had finally docked into home port. They were still fast asleep in their beds or in the process of just struggling to get up. Others were just wandering the ship or heading down to breakfast.

_The Total Drama crew however was just given the green light to begin early disembarkment…or they would have if they ever managed to find Lindsay's passport. Despite constant warnings, the bubbly blonde had packed the all important document into one of her many suitcases or so she thought._

"I think I packed the paper thingy in my Pralla…or was it Gooey? Or was it the Lou Vittle luggage?" Lindsay wondered out loud as Noah and Harold quickly pawed through the many suitcases and bags littering the entrance hall.

To expedite the process, each of the searched items was given to a few crew members who traveled the long gangway down to ground level where the other campers and Chef waited with several empty carts.

Dressed in a bright red Hawaiian shirt, Tyler talked adamantly on his cell phone a few feet from the group while in matching shirt and dress decorated with snakes and bears, Ezekiel and Izzy respectfully helped the crew with the luggage.

Or rather Ezekiel was. Izzy was bouncing on her feet eavesdropping in on the jock's conversation. "What he say what he say?!" Izzy asked eagerly as the jock continued to chat away before Tyler could comment someone else spoke up.

"NO ONE CARES! NOW HUSH! I GOT A HEADACHE AND YOU'RE MAKING IT WORSE!" Chef barked out in the direction of the red head's voice before groaning in displeasure."

Immediately something was shoved in his hand. "Less talking more water." Gwen ordered standing her ground at the scowl of death Chef shot her. "Gwen's right…you just concentrate on relaxing and getting rid of your hangover and we'll take care of everything." Bridgette added soothingly.

"RELAX?! HOW CAN I RELAX WITH THIS DANG BLINDFOLD OVER MY EYES?!" Chef yelled gesturing with a firm finger at his covered eyes wincing in the process. Gwen rolled her own. "You DID agree to let Harold put it on remember?"

"Yeah…BUT MOST PEOPLE DON'T FORCE THEIR SUPERIOR OFFICER TO WANDER FROM THEIR CABIN, THE WHOLE BLASTED SHIP AND DOWN TO SHORE WITH A BLINDFOLD ON!"

"Well we're not like most people!" Izzy chimed in cheerfully before her attention once again caught by the sound of another phone ringing this time coming from Chef's short pocket. "Izzy got it!" The crazy girl announced as she retrieved the phone. Grinning widely she answered it.

_

* * *

_

Due to the Total Drama phone plan that applied to everyone except for Chris McClain, it was soon discovered that Chef as well as his little eight camper charges could not be reached out in the middle of the ocean. And apparently they left their phones in the hotel room since they never answered the hundred of messages and texts that he had left, but now there was no excuse.

Grinning broadly at the familiar voice of the camp psycho broadcast conveniently through the crowded food tent for maximum gloat purposes, Chris McClain responded back. "Izzy! Crazy girl! How are you enjoying your LAST FEW HOURS in Sunny Florida?"

"_Oh, we're enjoying it just FINE."_

Izzy chuckled evilly causing the rest of explorers to exchange disturbed and worried looks. Chris blinked. "Yeee-ah…Izzy…for visual effect purposes describe what's happening around you…since obviously me...and the explorers ARE NOT THERE!" Izzy chuckled again.

"_Someone's a little jea-lous…but sure okay! My Zeke is helping the crew with 60% of the luggage, we've blindfolded Chef who's hung-over by the way and Gwen and Bridgey are watching him, Lindsay, Noah and Harold are still on the ship looking for Lindsay's passport in the other 40% of luggage and Tyler is on the phone with his…dad. And that's only this morning! You should have seen what ELSE happened!"_

Chris's eyes went wide. "What…else…IZZY! TELL ME YOU GOT IT ON FILM!" As their host continued to press the cackling red head for answers, both the Killer Finders and the Screaming Trekkers looked at each other.

"Sooo…guys anyone care to guess what happened?" Cody suggested casually. Eva next to the techno geek scoffed. "Well they obviously managed to make it back WITHOUT sinking the boat and if they had landed on "America's Most Wanted" We WOULD have heard about it from Mr. Big Mouth over there." The strong woman pointed out gesturing to the narcissist host.

"_That's cause My Zekey has been keeping an eye on his Izzy friend! Making sure Izzy didn't ruin her super stuffy dress for the nice picture, keeping meany Devi Devil away, going down the slide with her into the shark tent and ending up with a cameo on Amazing Dash-"_

"FOR THE LOVE OF ALL IMPORTED HAIR GEL! TELL ME YOU GOT THAT ON CAMERA!"

At the Screaming Trekkers table, Duncan next to LeShawna laughed in amusement both at Izzy's unexpected answer and the sight of Chris begging adamantly to the phone.

"Okay that girl may be whack, but you have to admit…she does have a certain finesse about it. And torture of the host is always a plus in my book. " The sister also smirked. "For once Baby Boy I have to agree."

Ignoring the outraged shriek from Courtney, the sassy female continued. "As much as I miss my Baby Girl and my Sugar Baby I hope they had a good time on that ship of there's after all after all we been through on this show we ALL could use a vacation away from Total Drama pain in my momma's-"

LeShawna's words were cut off by the excited yell on the other end this time belonging to Tyler. The jock was jumping up and down and yelling about something happily. Izzy proceeded to shush him.

"_Shhh!!! Izzy's talking to Chris! And Chef is not supposed to…oh! So Bridgey and Gwen took him to go get the shuttle? Uh huh...Uh huh…oh almost forgot…Hi everybody on Total Drama Wilderness! Izzy and the others miss you guys! Well…not Geoff since he voted off my buxomlicious buddy Lindsay, my partner in fruit crime Bridgey and CIT for voting off Izzy's ZEKE!!!"_

DJ let out a cough and stood up from the Killer Finder's table and walked over to take the phone away from Chris who reluctantly yet slowly handed over the phone to the gentle giant. DJ smiled before dressing his ex teammate on the phone.

"Actually Izzy, I as well as the other Finders…well we voted off Geoff. I feel guilty about it... but it was the right thing to do! Especially over the unfair vote and his not cool attitude. Not Cool!"

Just as quick as DJ's anger came, it faded and the brickhouse turned towards a more positive topic. "So now that you guys are off the ship I suppose your heading to the airport now huh." Izzy cackled causing DJ to jump up in fright as the red head explained.

"_Oh we're NOT going home TODAY. Since our guardian is monkey punch drunk WE can't get on the plane so Tyler got his dad to book us another flight! But since there's this BIG performance in Toronto something to do with some boy band super star we can't get home right away."_

Chris McClain's eyes narrowed. "And just WHEN are you guys heading back?"

"_Oh about 3 or 4 days from now…or is it 5 or 6…but hey! Gives us enough time to celebrate Chef's big day and for us wayward explorers to have even more fun!"_

* * *

"Hey Iris! I finally found my paper thingie!" Lindsay said cheerfully as she walked down the walkway followed by an exhausted Harold and Noah carrying the last of the luggage. "It had to be the very last bag."

Noah grumbled out while Lindsay pouted. "It was not! It was in the very first bag. You guys just looked from the wrong end." Harold slapped his forehead. "And you could have told us before GOSH!"

"_And you guys could have chosen another time to take that FREE trip of yours! Like I don't know…after the season when a certain ho-HEY!"_

"_Just ignore him, Chris is just a little hot under the collar about the whole Chef going and not him thing."_

Izzy grinned happily as the mostly _ignored annoyed complaints of Chris on the phone instantly became replaced with the sassy attitude of LeShawna. "What's up my sister??" LeShawna chuckled. _

"_Everything's fine here Izzy. Now if you don't mind can little Shawnie speak to her Sugar Baby?"_

"Sure! Hey Harold your girlfriend wants to-"

In a sudden burst of renewed energy, Harold raced over to Izzy and gladly took away the phone. "I've missed you my Chocolate Goddess." Harold cooed into the phone causing Lindsay to awww and Noah to shoot himself with an imaginary gun.

"_Same here Sugar Baby. Care to tell LeShawna about your adventures at sea?"_

_

* * *

_

Due to sheer amount of purchases by the Total Drama Crew, two shuttles had been needed. One carried the dosing Chef and most of the explorers while the other carried most the majority of the bags and a trio of former campers.

Whoever said distance made the heart grow fonder must have referred to Harold and LeShawna. Bridgette inwardly mused to herself as she watched the auburn haired nerd converse happily with his beloved goddess.

"_Not to worry my beloved, I shall faithfully record each and every sight so you can see them through video and photography since your gorgeous visage is incapable of seeing them in person at the present time."_

Harold gushed happily completely unaware of the chorus of both awws and disgust on the other end from both Chris and the other explorers. Bridgette giggled happily before her head turned towards the other person in the shuttle.

Ezekiel was currently staring out the window with his mouth open. Had the surfer girl been able to see his eyes behind his new video camera, she would notice his utter amazement with everything.

_Since the appearance of giant moving billboards advertising everything from a falling tower with people in it, to a giant green man and even an alien on a bicycle, Ezekiel had immediately sprung from the left side of the shuttle to the right in hopes of catching the fascinating images on film._

Bridgette chuckled. "Putting your birthday gift to good use I see." Ezekiel nodded back with a grin causing the camera to also bob. "I want to get the camera on everything foor my family eh! And wait til mom sees that I saw a bicycle riding alien!"

Harold fought back a snicker and Bridgette giggled a bit as she tried to explain. "Uh...Zeke that's actually a ride in one of the big parks here in Orlando…actually all of them are." The prairie boy's eyes widened.

"Really?! Wow…Izzy's gooing to be real excited eh…boot that elevator looks really unstable…maybe I won't have to go on that one…or the one with the green man…boot I'm dooing the bicycle with the alien eh!"

Bridgette couldn't help it and she laughed again a frequent occurrence as of late. Since she had gone on the cruise with Ezekiel and the others and she had been forced by Izzy to spend time with her best friend she had discovered more sides to the so called sexist boy.

_Without a doubt Ezekiel was as far from street smart as you could get. And he was naïve that was true, but somehow there was a hidden purity to his actions…easily missed unless you were paying attention._

_And her earlier assumption of the prairie boy being stupid couldn't be farther from the truth…the ease of the various foreign phrases out of his mouth followed by the lightning quick translations would have even Courtney's head spinning. _

_Then there was Ezekiel's dedication and loyalty to his friends, especially Izzy. No matter how unsure or unwilling he was, he almost always followed after Izzy for good or bad._

Though in Izzy's case it's usually the latter. Bridgette mused to herself with a smile. A sudden yell brought her attention back on the prairie boy. "I think that's the new hotel eh!" Ezekiel cheered before moving back towards the right for a closer look.

Just then the shuttle hit a bump causing Ezekiel to lose his balance and he pitched forward and landed in the blonde's lap causing Bridgette's eyes to widen in surprise and her face to flush pink before she smirked.

"And here I thought I was the clumsy one on the show." The ponytailed girl teased as a red faced Ezekiel removed himself from her lap and sank into the seat next to her smiling sheepishly as his free hand tugged on his toque.

* * *

Sitting up in the surprisingly soft seat, Chef Hatchet let out a loud yawn. As consciousness gradually returned, the camp cook was relieved to discover the lingering effects of his hang-over had finally dissipated.

Pleased that the pounding drums in his ears had vanished he let out another loud yawn before he opened his eyes…to familiar blackness. For a brief moment his mind panicked and his hands flew up to his eyes only to meet cotton.

The utter relief on his face turned to a scowl as he realized that those punk teenagers still had him wearing that god forsaken blindfold! Frowning he spoke. "Okay Maggots...I've been VERY patient. And that patience has now run out…so you better…REMOVE THIS BLASTED BLINDFOLD!"

Chef's keen military ears heard the sound of something swooshing into place as well as footsteps and something landing nearby with a heavy thump and a bounce. He also heard hurried whispering.

"Well?" Chef Hatchet demanded to the voices. There was a pause before Harold's raspy voice was heard. "Before we do…we shall require your promise that you shall neither look out the window nor shall you watch T.V. until we reveal the truth behind our epic web of-

"Oh my gosh!!! Harry! I just saw on the TV that there is actually a princess dress up shop in Dizzy World! They even give you this special slash if you go! And a super special one of it's your Birthday!"

The voice of the dimwitted blonde was followed instantly by a series of displeased groans. "GOSH! Thanks a lot for ruining the surprise!" Harold commented angrily before Chef's blindfold was immediately removed and his world went white.

Blinking a few times to get used to his surroundings, Chef immediately recognized his charges almost all clad in swim gear. The majority of the boys were sitting on a bed a few feet away while the girls were gathered in the doorway. All of them were glaring at Lindsay.

Ignoring the arguing teenagers for a moment, the show assistant took in the beach themed room from the beds to the drawn curtains. Shoving the drape aside Chef's Hatchet's eyes widened even more.

"_See this is why we should have also blindfolded Lindsay…would have saved us the trouble."_

"_You're not covering my girlfriend's eyes!"_

"_Of course we didn't, which leads us to now."_

"_You Guys! Can't we just settle this peacefully?"_

Having concluded his inspection of the hotel room, the cook turned to address the group. "Does anyone want to tell me why we're here and not up in the airplane right now?" Noah stepped forward.

"Three reasons. One you were drunk, leading to boarding forfeiture had we actually gone to the airport. Lucky for you we planned ahead. As for Two…there's apparently some hot shot boy band in Toronto and instead of waiting fruitlessly on standby we made other arrangements."

"And Three we COULD have gotten the last seats for the flight tonight, but we choose not to! After all…who wants to go back home on your Birthday?! So we're here for longer!" Izzy chimed gleefully.

For once Chef was speechless. "You…soldiers did this all for me?" The group nods. "Yep! And not to worry my dad and Lindsay's folks are paying for the trip extension! Tyler said with a smile.

"And Tyler and I had to give up like the latest limited edition nail polish and the sweat suit, but it's so worth it cause now we get to meet all the movie princesses!" Lindsay squealed before she looked thoughtful. "I wonder if Beth will let me borrow one of her dresses…"

"Beth YES! Belle NO! My Birthday I get to ask her!" Chef Hatchet frowned before he grinned at the group. "Now Soldiers you got 5 minutes to get ready, before I leave you behind!" The explorers saluted.

_

* * *

_

Salagadoola Means Mechicka Booleroo

_But The Thingamabob That Does The Job Is_

_Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo…_

Gwen stabbed her fork through her pork chop and viciously drew her knife back with the ease of a professional murderer. Noah raised an eyebrow. "I take it you don't care for the song." The know-it-all drawled.

The goth scowled. "I'm in a fairy tale castle. I had to take multiple pictures with sugary sappy princesses and to top it of I'm even DRESSED like a sugary sappy princess!" Gwen said angrily as she once again fought down the urge to rip the pink fabric of her dress and yank the crown from her head.

"But it's Chef's day eh." Ezekiel commented with a smile his toque oddly enough matching the soft lily pad green uniform that he wore. "And he looks loike he's having fun." The prairie boy observed pointing at the end of their table.

Chef dressed in a buttercup yellow dress (something that had required a great deal of persuasion) gleefully clapped his hands in time with the music wearing his Birthday sash and the glittery tiara proudly.

"And when Chef found out that Chris and the producers wanted to pay for his Birthday dinner tonight, he insisted that we all visit the boutique and get the glamour treatment." Bridgette said also smiling very much at home in her flower gown.

"Not to mention our Birthday Chef insisted on picking out all of our prince and princess outfits. I wish that LeShawna was here she would have made an Awwwesome Jasmine, but between me and my buddy Zeke we shall capture every moment! "

Harold cheered happily before his camera became a sudden blur of motion with the appearance of giant mice in dresses dancing around the tables while the fairy godmother cheerfully asked the crowded room of people if they had a birthday.

Happily Chef and the other birthday people replied, receiving pieces of Birthday cake. Gwen on the other hand…her eyes were wide in horror. "Tell me this will be over soon." She moaned her head hitting the table.

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings: For starters I don't drink so if I got the hang-over symptoms wrong let me know so I can fix. And hopefully I don't have to explain about Lindsay and her bags…anyway disembarkment varies per ship so I guessed there and the billboards more or less exist.

The Prince and Princess outfits as far as I know they don't sell adult versions in the park…though I could be wrong…and Chef is well Chef…a huge once in a lifetime exception in his case.

Also the group is sitting at Cinderella's Royal Table one of the big dining experience in Disney World. ;) And I don't own the song either.

Hope you guys enjoy! And Necro…how's the punctuation this time? :) *hug*

Thanks for the reviews!

Imagi


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